Monday mornings aren’t consistently as bad as they used to be, so that’s a good thing. I have woken up dreaming about Matt the last two mornings in a row though, so that’s not as good. Yesterday was Sunday so waking up in a melancholy mood wasn’t that big of a deal. This morning though, I woke up much earlier than usual due to the time change, and had enough time to take a 1.5 mile walk and then a shower before work. That helped a lot.

The weekend ended up being very enjoyable. I hung out with Ryan on Friday night (we drove around blaring K’s Choice – it was awesome). Went to Hidden Lakes on Saturday morning; not only was that the first time I’d ever hiked out there without Matt, but it was also the first time I’d ever hiked by myself. I LOVED it. I might do Beaman Park next weekend.

**********I got tired of writing yesterday and saved the draft but forgot to come back to it…until now************

I never finished describing my weekend, so in brief: I hung out with Nate Saturday, then hung out with Mar on Sunday. Otherwise, I hung out with the cats. I’ve been listening to K’s Choice pretty exclusively for the last few days and am learning one of their songs. It’s in F which is a key that I hate, but I can’t figure out how to transpose the F/a into the key of G – plus it sounds better in F as long as I can play all the chords correctly.

Yesterday evening, I went home and watched the last episode of Breaking Bad. It was……….how I would have wished that it would end. That show is so good.

Tonight I’m probably going to watch V for Vendetta with the cats. They likely won’t pay much attention though.

I have to say – I have not minded the time change SO FAR. The last couple of days, I’ve been up early enough to take a walk before I have to get ready for work, and I think that has been improving my mood a lot (imagine that!). I’m not happy about it being so dark by 5:00 at night, but it happens every year so there’s not much use complaining about it.

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I'm a young, childless widow who is trying to figure out the best way to deal with the world in light of my late husband's suicide. It's harder than I ever imagined it would be, but somehow at the same time I am still alive and even happy sometimes.

2 thoughts on “Monday/Tuesday”

  1. Today at work someone asked me the date, and I said, “remember, remember the 5th of November.” They all looked at me like I was stupid. I just had to shake my head and move on. ALSO, not a single person I work with has seen I Heart Huckabees or any Wes Anderson movie….! Sometimes I wonder how people even make it through this world.


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