I don’t feel beauty the way I used to. I hope this is temporary. Beauty used to arrest me, almost taking me by surprise. Lately though, when I notice something beautiful, I react one of two ways – if it reminds me of Matt , then all I can think about is him; otherwise, I just feel kind of numb. I know I should be moved by beauty…but I can’t force it.

I hope this goes away soon.

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