in my head too much this week

…and not getting enough out onto paper.

I have the urge today to pick up and move to a new city – clean slate. I’m not going to do this, though – at least, not right now. Instead, I’m going to do a small hike after work and hope that it “resets” something. I’m feeling pretty stagnated at the moment. Need some new endeavor or some such. Moving to a new city seems nice. Though moving to a different part of Nashville could also help.

I really need something in my life to work towards – besides work. Just feeling kind of weepy today for no good reason that I can find. Work is going ok; it’s not my Favorite Job Ever so far, but it’s fine. I just feel like I could burst out crying if I had the right mental image or memory of Matt. Probably a few other things could make me cry too. Again – no good reason that I can tell…..

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I'm a young, childless widow who is trying to figure out the best way to deal with the world in light of my late husband's suicide. It's harder than I ever imagined it would be, but somehow at the same time I am still alive and even happy sometimes.

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