It’s his second night at home. I should be happy, I know – I was last night. But I’m actually still feeling neglected. Why? I’m not 100% sure, but I think mostly it’s because I feel like I care more about him than he cares about me. We’re both very selfish people of course, but I just feel like he should be more interested in ME to the exclusion of other things. As I think I am. But then there’s the question of how rational that is. Because he does pay attention to me and care about me – just not to the extent that I want him to. He’s over there asleep right now. It really makes me sad but I don’t think it should. Uggggggggh. How am I supposed to be rational but not apologize for my feelings at the same time???


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I'm a young, childless widow who is trying to figure out the best way to deal with the world in light of my late husband's suicide. It's harder than I ever imagined it would be, but somehow at the same time I am still alive and even happy sometimes.

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